4 Weeks!

I can't believe I have been a mommy for a month now! Aiden has been such a blessing. He really is such a wonderful baby! He sleeps 5 hours at a time (3-4 on a bad day and 6 on a great day) and eats 6oz when he wakes up. None of this newborn sleeping 3 hours and eating 3oz business. We like his schedule much better, we feel lucky! He isn't a crier at all either. He will fuss a little, and he will scream when he doesn't want to have his clothes taken off, but he is not the type to just cry for no reason. It's soo nice.

Switching to formula has been such a blessing for us. I feel like a different person. I enjoy sitting down and feeding him a bottle, I am no longer dreading his feedings. Also we are all getting more rest because Kris and I can share the duties and relax more. I'm so glad I finally made the choice, even Aiden seems to enjoy his bottles. He cries "hungy" (no r) when he is hungry. Kris and I swear he does. No one else hears it or believes us yet, but we swear EVERY TIME he is hungry he cries the word HUNGY at least once. Too cute.

4 weeks also brings his first outing without mommy and daddy. I had a wedding to be in this last weekend, which will be another post all together, and he got to spend time with his grandparents. My mom watched him on Friday, and Kris' parents watched him for 6hrs on Saturday! 6 hours! I did really well being away from him that long, I missed him of course, but he was fine and I knew that. He is such an easy going baby that all his grandparents said it was the easiest job to do. He didn't even poop for Lolo & Lola on Saturday, he saved it up until we were home.

According to my Wii Fit Aiden is probably about 8.5lbs as of Thursday I think it was? I'll weigh him again tomorrow. Anyway we had to go up to size 1 diapers today. All weekend he had poop and pee explosions and blowouts in his newborn diapers, so up a size we went. Now he has a bit of saggy crotch going on, but the extra room means no more poop everywhere!

That is about all for his updates. He loves his bath time more these days, I think it may become a nightly routine in the future. Hope you enjoyed the pics!

The Object of My Affection....

Write a love letter to the object of your affection......

Dear Black Leather Reclining Rocking Chair,
I loved you when I first saw you and brought you home in February. However, I didn't realize how much I loved you until this week. We own a glider, but he can't replace you. He does a nice job when things are calm and we are just rocking to spend time together, but he can't handle stress the way you do. You can take the almost violent rocking and your overstuffed body provides more cushion for my achy back. You my dear rocking chair are my favorite. Not only can you help me rock and rock and rock all night long, but you then RECLINE. Yes, that's right, you allow me to lay back and kick my feet up. You are wide enough that I can pull one leg up and tuck it under me and get comfy enough to doze off in. I have found you are a decent alternative to my cozy bed which I haven't seen in nights (except for those hours when Kris is enjoying your comforts). Oh chair you are my new love, thank you.

Dear coffee maker,
You have always been something I admire and love. Lately though you have helped me more than ever. I always needed you for a little pick me up during the day, but you really are saving my life and keeping me awake! Thank you for providing me my sanity!

Dear Christmas Tree,
You are my true new object of affection. I know you can't really show love back, but well, just looking at you all tall and perfect makes me feel a bit happier inside. You make me smile. You brighten up my days and nights, literally that is, with your lights twinkling so bright. You are the most perfect tree we have ever seen, you look like you belong on a Macy's show floor. I know we put you up super early this year, but we really needed a pick me up to our spirits. We were down and out and having you around has made our home peaceful. You didn't let us down. You were the best clearance buy ever last year, we are soo proud to keep you forever. It's reminded us that things are okay and will improve. We have things to look forward to and you are a reminder than seasons come so quickly and time moves on. Thank you for being soo beautiful, for providing us with the most perfect tree for our son's first Christmas, and for giving us our spirit back.

Join in at Mama Kat's for your weekly assignment. Oh and for those of you who are now oh so curious... I will be posting pics eventually of our Tree, which is up already and really is the most perfect tree ever.

Changes On The Horizon.....

So here we go, life is going to change a lot. My last post, just 2 days ago, asked for prayers for my husbands job. Well, the next day, yesterday, it was announced that his ENTIRE company is being eliminated. At least the local office. He was a Comcast contractor as I mentioned before and there has been NO JOBS for his company. So Comcast cancelled their contract with 2 companies, my husbands because it was a small group, and another contractor in the local area. So this sucks. He has been laid off. He is turning in his truck today. He is very sad about this because he really loved his job and did very well at it. Plus, when there were actually jobs to be done he made a lot of money! We are sad. However we are trying to stay positive. He will now get unemployment, which he wasn't able to collect any $ even when working less than 40hrs before... Also I am going to apply for WIC and Food Stamps this week. Now that we are a 2 unemployment income family I think it's a smart choice to help out temporarily. We are also very lucky that both our families are able to help us out when needed for a bit. *sigh* I just feel bad because Kris loved his job and I pray that God is opening a door to a new job he will love even more! Also we are looking at this as time for him to spend with Aiden when he is still little because time will fly by and this is the only time he will be so little.

Next huge change... Breastfeeding no more. Yep, I have complained on here already, but things are getting worse. As of yesterday I woke up with huge pain in my right breast, it's most likely just a clogged duct AGAIN, but it also looks like a small milk blister is forming again. This is awful, I'm in pain 24/7 and it's making breastfeeding soo daunting. It's not fair to Aiden at all that his mommy dreads feeding him and cries half the time that she does! After all my troubles, and my huge guilt for not enjoying it I made the decision this week to stop. I started introducing formula as a nighttime bottle and he is taking well to it. He was already great at bottle feeding so I wasn't worried about that. He has been sleeping better at night the last 2 nights. Not that his sleep has anything to do with my choice. I realized that I was forcing myself to try and continue with breastfeeding because everyone said "it gets easier, stick with it" and "breast is best" and that feeling guilty about giving formula over breast milk is NOT a good reason to keep doing it. I need to do what will make me happy, because Aiden is starting to get fussy with me at our night feedings - he knows his mommy is stressed and NOT enjoying that experience. My stress with breastfeeding is making life in our house hard, I need to do what is best for us, not follow others advice.

So there you have it. Now i just hope I can make it through weaning alive. Aiden will be fine, but I know this means more breast pain and issues. *sigh* I just want it to be over so I can enjoy my day more.

3 weeks!

Whoops, I'm behind! Not a surprise really. 3 weeks has brought us a growth spurt full of nonstop eating and no sleep! Boy it's fun! Little man is growing well though, and I'm learning to sleep sitting up in the rocking chair. No real update though. He outgrew one newborn outfit, it's a romper that is too tight in the crotch. All the other newborn clothes fit fine or are even big still, like the pjs he is wearing now. He has more personality these days. He only wants to be held facing out, he is looking at the monitor while sitting on my left leg now (i'm right handed), and grumbles when you hold him any other way. He really does grumble, it's too funny to listen to him.

Breastfeeding has brought me to tears all week. I want soo badly to enjoy it and do it exclusively, but well, it's draining me and the night feedings are awful. He eats well all day and then from 10pm-3am he wants to eat for an hour (30 mins each boob) and then an hour later he wants to eat again. I'm really exhausted by 1am and do not enjoy the nighttime bonding like I should. Instead i'm clock watching waiting for it to be over and resenting Kris because he gets to sleep the entire hour I'm feeding Aiden. That's not fair to my husband or Aiden. I decided after tons of tears and feelings of guilt and failure, that tonight I will give him a warm bottle of formula at bedtime. Even if he is up all night I will get more sleep feeding him a bottle than boobs. I know I can start pumping more (I only do it now when my boobs ache) and do BM bottles at night, but right now, this week, I need a boob break! I don't know if things will change later, like if i pump more and stop formula, or if we keep doing boobs during the day and formula at night. Only time will tell. I just have come to the conclusion that if I'm exhausted and stressed and dreading feedings at night I'm no good for Aiden. They say that a happy mommy makes for a happy baby!

In other news, I'd like to ask for prayers. Kris' job has really slowed down and we are stressing about money. We are luck, both our families are willing and able to help out, but prayers would be nice! Thank you! I will now leave you with a weekly pic update!