UPDATE UPDATE

Wow, after several years ive decided to try and resurrect this little blog of mine. I recently told a friend I missed having a place to write. Then out of nowhere a blog "challenge" if you will came about on a public group im in. So here I am and I'm going to try and keep this thing going. Bare with me as I make changes and update content. Feel free to sift through my old posts, you just might learn something new about me....

Friday, June 18, 2010

Purging My Hoarder Ways

I always see those shows on TLC about people who hoard and it's ruining their lives and their quality of life.  I have never thought of myself even close to those people.  However, as I look back on my short life I realize I have some hoarder tendencies. 

For example, my closet in high school was sooo full of crap that when you open the doors one of two things happened... stuff coming falling down like an avalanche, OR the doors got stuck on something on the floor and would come off track.  I mean to tell you, my mom can attest to this, my closet was at least waist high in teen and soap opera magazines, clothes and shoes, old school work, gifts I never used but couldn't get rid of.  I was a hoarder at that stage.  It took days to clean that out when we finally moved.  Sad thing is, I kept most of it when I went to college and just moved it into boxes into storage where it all still sits today.  {Family plan is to finally clean out that storage as 90% can be tossed now}

I have come to a stage now in life where I still keep a few things, like random cards and papers, old broken jewelry and clothes that have no hope of fitting me again for years.  It is not bad, and people don't come in my house, or look in my closet for that matter, and think I am crazy or messy.  It's now to the point though where having baby toys all over the house I have lost all control of clutter.  I can't handle it anymore.  I feel stressed when it gets cluttered around the house, I can't relax with a book unless I pick up all the junk mail and random toys.  I just get stressed with it all.  It must stop before I just give up and turn up on a show.

In the last year I have had these thoughts of "I just want to throw EVERYTHING out - just live with the absolute basics".  Now that we are moving, I am TOTALLY doing just that.  I'm donating ALL my old clothes, all those size 6's and 8's I keep pretending I'll use again, even some of the 10-14's.  Let's be honest, if I really get to my ideal size 10-12 again I'll just reward myself with NEW CLOTHES.  So why not let people that size actually wear the clothes now?  Nice shoes that don't fit anymore, books I forgot I owned and will never read.  Would you believe I just threw out an entire garbage bag worth of old socks, bras, and underwear?  I buy new, and just put the old in the back.  Why?  Because I have hoarder tendencies.

To realize I have the possibility to become an old women who has hoarded her entire life was scary.  I do NOT want to live in clutter, or hold onto old memories.  SO I am finally kicking the habit to the curb.  I have slowly been doing so since I met Kris, but now it's like this intense urge to just throw everything out.  It feels soo good to take bags to the trash, or soon enough to do a goodwill trip.  I feel stronger and really accomplished at the end of the day.  I love the look of an empty house.  Not empty in the complete sense, but in that you can see space and counters and open closets. 

My in-laws live that way, well, their garage is another story, but the house is simple and neat.  Aiden will of course add more to that, but I do not want to bring all my crap in.  I want to be able to relax and not stress over clutter.  So here I go, throwing out last years Halloween candy and candy dish.  Anyone need a purple tulip candle I've never burned but had since high school??  Anyone need a dusty glass chess set?  How about old Christmas decorations? 

2 comments:

June Freaking Cleaver said...

I got rid of 35 years of junk before I moved here with The Boy to MO. I shipped 150 pounds of clothes, toys, photos and books (and a few sentimental items) - and dumped everything else.

At first, just the thought of giving up all my "stuff" both scared and angered me - I worked for every bit of it.

But then I thought what I was moving TO...and The Mister and I thought a brand new start was the way to go - nobody wondering WHO sat on my couch, or slept in my bed, or ate from my cookware.

Fresh starts rock!

雲亨 said...

I guess I will need a lot..................................................

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