How Did You Break It?
I have broken a lot of things over the years, and have decided a short list will best do for today. We will start with my 2 most recent broken objects and finish off with 2 of the first things I recall breaking. Take note that of the oddball out in my 4 examples.
My Toe: Yep, I posted a blog all about it. I was getting up in the middle of the night to walk out a leg cramp, and to pee, and my entire left leg gave out from underneath me. It was awful. I fell hard on my butt and somehow managed to land smack onto my left foot. My poor little pinky toe really had no way to escape. It broke. It was ugly. It became all purple and blue and the colors ran down the side of my foot. It's been a month now and it is still a little tender if I put pressure on it. At least the color has returned to normal and I can wear shoes again!
Our New Sofa: Yep, NEW. I seem to break chairs a lot. I will give 2 examples next, but a sofa? We got a lovely new black leather sofa earlier this year. It is kinda overstuffed and the arms are very "fluffy". Meaning when you lay down they are like pillows built in for you head. It's great. Well, there isn't much to how I broke it. I can't put shoes on very well anymore thanks to my growing belly, so I naturally just sit on the arm of the sofa closest to the door where my shoes generally are. After who knows how many times I had done this, it gave way. I sat down and all of a sudden heard a nice "crack" and felt like I sank down a little. After my husband inspected it we learned that the piece of wood that sits under the fluffy pillow part is what broke. Lucky for us it has another support for the arm itself, but well, you now have to lean against that side carefully. And I am no longer allowed to sit on the arms of the furniture.
A Recliner Chair: So back in middle school my best friend Tori and I always used to settle into a reclining rocking chair that was in my mom's living room. Somehow we would both fit, but we would be at odd angles and putting weight on both arms of the chair. Well, one glorious day we were sitting in our favorite chair, most likely watching some *Nsync concert tape, and the chair split. The arm that my butt was nicely resting on snapped away from the rest of the chair. So the entire side of the chair was just dangling off to the side. It was pathetic. Of course we all laughed at the time, but I am not so sure my mom was thrilled I broke the comfy chair.
A Porch Swing: So Tori and I were again in middle school, perhaps 9th grade, but we were young and still in love with *Nsync. It was a lovely evening and we were swinging on the wood porch swing. We weren't goofing off, or doing anything other than 2 girls rocking back and forth and enjoying our gossip of the week. Out of nowhere a nice loud break was heard and then an even louder "SPLAT". That's right folks, this was the start of all the chair breaking. The entire swing came undone from the wood planks it was hanging from (I blame my uncle) and fell right onto the concrete porch. Mom came running out and there was a mix of laughter at the two of us still sitting on the swing, on the ground, with the chains and wood plank still attached sitting around us. The swing itself thankfully wasn't broken, but I never sat on it again.
There you have it, a few things that I have broken. For a girl who struggled with weight all my life and had low self-confidence growing up, breaking chairs is bad. I'm surprised I can still laugh at these stories. However, the fact that I continue to break chairs (or sofas as the case may be) I have a healthy fear of being the lady who sits down in public and the chair gives way under her. I think I'd rather keep breaking my toe...
6 comments:
dreadful... but breaking toes can never be good either! Being a bigger girl myself, I have always had that fear. I am on a journey to lose weight! I enjoyed your post!The Neuff's Puppy 'Dish'
Breaking things always makes for good laughs later!!! I see you are expecting, CONGRATS!!!!
So sorry about the sofa! That really stinks!
Breaking your toe is the worst too because it takes so long to heal!!!!
I broke a chair once. At my babyshower. A big chair. And everyone was watching me. And they laughed.
I don't think I can laugh about that 7 years later : /
Oh my gosh. This list of things you broke is so funny! I am awfully glad that no one was in the house to see you break the couch arm. That is crazy! : )
Congratulations on your baby. It is so fun to see it floating around up there! SWEET!
Oh gosh, I can only imagine your face after the porch swing broke. A mix of laughter with confusion.
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